A New Year

What a year it has been. I didn’t realize how much had happened until I saw it through pictures. In those pictures, I was reminded of how much I have changed, physically and emotionally.

Freshman year, whether it be high school or college, is a life changing year. One huge change I made my freshman year of college was dying my hair for the first time. I of course had to go all big and dye my hair blonde, which was quite the opposite from my dark brown hair. That was the first change I did to my hair this past year. During this time, I was just completely lost. I really had no idea what I wanted out of life. I had switched my major, and wanted to switch it again. I also was really close to dropping out of college all together, which I ended up doing in the end.

Dropping out of college lead to the next change I did to my hair, which was cutting it all off. When I say this, I mean going from my hair being to my butt to above my shoulders. It was at the beginning of the summer when I did this. I was still lost, but even more so. I was done with life. I had lost hope completely and wanted to die. I prayed to God each day asking Him to kill me. These feelings lasted the entire summer. Like I said earlier, I had just dropped out of college a month or two before, which I had regretted almost instantaneously. Close to the end of summer, I found out that it was an almost guarantee for me to be able to go back to college without skipping a semester or two. This was when I found hope. This hope led to my next and current hair style.

I went back to my natural hair color, well as close as I could get. When I dyed my hair back to the realm of brown, I gained a part of me I had lost. The entire time I was blonde, I felt like I was looking at myself from the outside, and dying my hair just added to the lostness that I was feeling. Even so, I will never regret dying my hair blonde because it was an experience that I grew from. I grew into a person who knows themselves a little better. I grew into someone who is more confident with who they are. I grew into someone who has a purpose in life.

I hope to bring this new me into 2016.