So Much To Be Thankful For

This year looks different in so many ways. Good and bad. Despite that, there is so much to be thankful for. This year compared to last year is almost night and day in how my life looks like.

Last year this time I was incredibly broken. I was skeptical of everything and everyone even those I loved and trusted. Last year, I was invited into the home of a family I hadn’t really met before. Then add twenty plus more family members I got to meet for the first time. The entire evening I stuck close to the one person I was comfortable with, yet still struggled completely trusting at the time.

I didn’t think much would come out of this invitation. This invitation gave me a family. A family that has helped me heal and feel loved in ways I haven’t felt in years.

This year of course looks different from everything that is going on in the world. That big group that came together last year was unable to come together this year. But some of us did. The me that was today has been someone I haven’t seen in a bit or maybe even ever. I got handed the phone with a FaceTime call from a family member we were unable to see this year. I had a conversation with them, something especially of late that hasn’t come easy to me. Today, I was like, “Sure I’ll talk to the fam.” I interacted. I spent time with people as if I had known them for years compared to only a year.

I didn’t know how I was going to do today. I didn’t think it was going to be bad by any means. I was going to a house I had never been to before. With people, I know but had only met once. Some twice. Almost instantly, I was able to feel comfortable and ready to enjoy some fellowship with wonderful people.

If you would have told me last year that I would be where I am mentally and emotionally I wouldn’t have ever believed you. I didn’t think I was going to make it. I felt violated and alone. I never thought I would be able to get me back, let alone get a better me back. I still have more to go, I am not going to deny that. The fact that I can have days like I did today is something in itself to be extremely thankful for.

I am thankful for where I once was. I am thankful for where I am. I am thankful for where I will be.