Find Love Together – Logan Briana

I started watching the Apple TV original, The Morning Show. I went into it not knowing too much about what it was going to be about. I knew it had Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon in it but that was about it.

Never did I expect to start watching the show and see it touch a lot of what I was currently dealing with. The Morning Show shows the behind the scenes of a tv station, specifically its morning news show. One of the main hosts of the show has been terminated for sexual harassment and then some. There are currently eight episodes out and a new one comes out every Friday. I encourage you to watch it, even so, more if you are a woman. It does have some mature scenes, so be aware of that. Here is the trailer:

After the last couple of weeks and having things go down in my life in the sexual harassment area with having the person who harassed me be terminated. Then watching this show and seeing a similar situation on an even bigger scale. It made the show even more impactful. I was also recently told about another situation that didn’t involve a work environment but still involving the sexual pressure of a man. My initial response to it all is, “Why?”

I understand men need to feel powerful. Yes, men have sexual needs and urges but there are other ways to respond to those needs. There is no need to push yourself onto someone who does not want or deserve your abuse. I listen to Sophia Bush’s podcast, A Work in Progress, where she has brought up several times now that research shows that a woman who has been sexually assaulted has as much PTSD as soldiers who come back from combat. Yet, when women decide to share what has happened to them, it gets downplayed. Then they think why even come forward for it to not do much except change people’s views about them and in some cases have people not believe them. There is a mini-series on Netflix called, Unbelievable. This is another show I highly recommend, but it can be triggering, especially if you have been sexually assaulted. It is based on a true story about, Marie, a teenager who was charged with lying about being raped. The person who raped her was a serial rapist in which you see the stories of a couple of the victims. They all come from different backgrounds which contribute to how they recall the incident. It was nearly a decade until it was proven that Marie was telling the truth. She came forward only to be talked into saying what happened to her didn’t happen. If it wasn’t for two FEMALE detectives to see that it was the same person raping these girls, then the teenager would have lived her entire life being told that what happened to her didn’t happen. I noticed early on that all of the other victims had one or the other of those two female detectives where Marie only had male detectives on her case, which were the ones who convinced her to go on record that she made it up for attention.

Going back to sexual harassment in the workplace. It is so common that it is downplayed and goes unreported. A lot of the time it is because the victim is afraid for all kinds of reasons. Also, they think it’s just them so they decide to keep it private. The majority of the time if not all of the time it isn’t only them who are being affected. So many of the men who say and do things to women tend to be important to the company. Both in The Morning Show and my personal experience, the man was well known and loved by hundreds of people. It is intimidating to report someone so beloved and in such a prestigious role. I believe that is why so many women are stereotyped to “sleep their way to the top.” There are many times where women are pressured into doing something for a man that they don’t want to do but end up doing. After the fact, people say things like, “Didn’t you say no,” or “You must have been okay with it if you let it happen.” There are times where the man will make sure the woman doesn’t move up in the ladder if they deny what the man wants. By default of having these things forced upon them, the woman then moves up in their position. In my situation, there weren’t too many things to be promoted to, but I had people thinking I was in a senior position. A lot of it was because I had worked every production and knew what I was doing. I believe it was also because I had the boss treating me differently behind the scenes which did occasionally seep into the public part of the job. People could tell he favored me despite how hard he tried to hide it.

Women will sacrifice their worth for men. So much of the time it is because of pressure. I believe a lot of the time those women do know their worth, but before they know it they’re doing something that they said they wouldn’t do. Men will do something for the woman first, and then ask the woman to do something in return. Men will manipulate their victim(s). A lot of them know exactly how to manipulate to get what they want. Many times the man gets the victim to where they need them to make it harder for the victim to turn back. I know with me he got me “trapped” by the time I realized what was truly happening so it felt almost impossible to share with anybody what he had said or done to me.

I am glad that Apple has created a show like The Morning Show because it does show a lot of what sexual harassment can look like. I relate a lot to the characters and the feelings that they are feeling. I hope this show can open people’s eyes and show them that this happens all of the time to anyone. For the last three years with it happening to me, I have asked God so many times as to why did it have to happen to me. If anything this happening to me has pushed me, even more, to fight for women and their rights. We don’t deserve to worry daily about getting unwanted attention by men on all scales. I want to help support and encourage all women to fight for their worth. No man is worth sacrificing your worth. It is a much easier fight to keep that worth when you have someone fighting with you. The thing is my self-worth was at one of its highest when he came along. Now, I have to fight against myself once again to stop comparing myself to others. He preyed on me when I was at my most isolated and ended up destroying me. Maybe if I had someone next to me fighting for my worth then I would have been able to last longer without giving in to some of his demands and report him.

If I got anything out of the last three years is even if you think it’s the tiniest thing I encourage you to report any kind of behavior that you think is harassment. If I hadn’t shrugged off some of the things he said and actually told someone, I would have saved me a lot of mental and emotional damage that I am now trying to heal from.

Disclaimer: I know men can be and are victims of sexual harassment and abuse. I want any man who may read this, who has been a victim, to know that I support you. Your feelings are 100% valid. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.